Eerie.
Your love…is extravagant. Your friendship is so intimate. I find I’m moving to the rhythm of your grace. Your fragrance is intoxicating in our secret place. Your love…..is extravagant. Spread wide in the arms of Christ, is a love that covers sin. No greater love have I ever known. You’d consider me your friend. Capture my ♥ again.
“
| — | Aaron Gilespie |
Stop it brain!
So I am Facebook stalking pretty much everyone…That means YOU! I’m bored out of my mind and over-thinking about things. As usual. Sometimes I wish I could just make myself happy. The medication doesn’t work at all. All it does is mask your feelings from others. My head is always turning. Depression is an odd thing. You can be happy and in a moments time, your brain won’t let you. You feel like you don’t deserve to be happy. As if you are unworthy. But in your eyes, everyone else deserves to be happy. What’s up with that? I don’t really want everyone to know what goes on in my head but I feel like I should say it. I don’t want to cry anymore. I don’t want to feel insignificant because I think I am. I want to value my being. I want others to see that I’m happy. I want these wants to be true. All of my problems stem from being insecure. The fact that I am a perfectionist probably stems from the fact that I want to please everyone. I want them to appreciate me. When I am being generous, I want people to know that I care. I don’t like one thing about myself. I have no idea what my purpose is. I give things of myself just so people will want to be around me. That’s not right. I really don’t know how I have so many friends, but let me tell you…I wouldn’t have it any other way. My friends in good ole’ PA are my crew. I would do anything for you guys and you know I’m always here. I will never let my depression destroy a friendship again. Please forgive me, those who hate who my depression makes me. I really do try. I moved to MO to fix these things and hopefully be happier and healthier thanks to it. :]
Hmm
So what you’re really saying is absolutely nothing. I hate how sometimes well, most of the time I compare myself to others. I want to have her body, his talent, and their drive. Well unfortunately I’m just little ole’ me. No matter what I do I am stuck with who I am. Nevertheless, I will try to love myself a little more every day. I will pray that I will discover what my talent/purpose is and then I will use it for the will of God. Sometimes we can’t choose what we are, but we can choose who we want to be.
